A little glimpse into my thoughts as I am reading Fourth Wing for the first time after seeing it being such a thing. These thoughts occurred over chapters 3 and 4. I’ve already posted the thoughts during chapters 1 and 2 of this read along thing.

Well she survived so far. I don’t know if it’s the print size or what but it being so small makes it feel like the chapters are rather long.

Another love interest has been introduced.

Dain.

So there’s my predicted love triangle Dain and Xaden. Good versus evil.

At least she got her boot back. How long till someone she’s close to betrays her though? Can only be a matter of time, probably chapters. Unless it’s being held out for one of her own squad??? To attempt murder before the big trials??

That would be if it’s following the same rhythm as the divergent series.

I hope at least one of her friends she makes in her class don’t try to kill her.

I wonder if the random snarky character will live much longer or if he earns/keeps his place as a comedic relief?

I must read on.

Ok I will admit I went into this with no idea what this book is about, I have seen no spoilers, I picked it to read next because there is some cute fandom merch on Etsy with dragons so I was curious.

I am currently two chapters in. I have predictions and theories about the directions in this book and I wanted to put them somewhere so I don’t get too many spoilers thrown back at me.

Ok, so first thing I want to ask, is what is with the font? It’s tiny and awkward to read, I got the paperback I don’t know if it makes any difference?

Next, I like the little info bits above the chapter headings, it really helps the world building… and the map at the start also super helpful because I struggled to picture things when the info dump occurred.

So the first couple of chapters I have noticed that it’s well written info dumping about the lore to this book. I hear its a series so I am trying my best to concentrate to remember things.

The mention of Violet being so small and is going to go do the super dangerous things is really giving me the vibe of Tris in Divergent. As the main character I am anticipating she is likely to survive in very unlikely situations. Using her fear and talking to herself about all her scribe knowledge and lore to get through scary dangerous stuff is a wonderful tool to give us all the information. I like it, it doesn’t feel like a “here’s all the history memorise this you will need it later when things get confusing” kind of dump either.

Dylan dying within what felt like five minutes, killing off the hopeless romantic, has a little shock factor. Jack? I think his name is screams raging male insecurity. Absolute w*nker in the making. I don’t think he will have much a redemption arch. I can see the whole set up with Xaden though, looks like it will be enemies to lovers, good motivation for them to hate each other, families killing each other, her instant “damn he’s hot” moment. They’re surely going to be love interests throughout, I suspect he will help her when she could easily die.

Looking forward to reading more…

Ok… I finally read the last book from the Never After series, hooked.

So it was much easier to read than the last one, Scarred. I liked it kind of. I mean I read it faster, it was less of a chore.

Things I personally didn’t like was the breath play, call me traumatised but that doesn’t sound like a risk worth taking, how easily it can go wrong. But also, Hook treats her so badly. doesn’t make any true, realistic, authentic apology to her, it all gets rug swept and there is no consequences at all for locking her in a basement.

I don’t know why but not only is that a whole parade of red flags but a bunch of deal breakers, and yet it’s expected to be lapped up in the dark romance section. I have to ask, are you all ok? Do you need some therapy? Like you deserve healing and healthy relationships.

I don’t know why but I would love to know if there is something out there where the bad stuff happens, damage is done massively to their relationship they get therapy and realise that the “love” they have doesn’t out weigh the damage and they go on to become healthier versions of themselves so that their next relationship doesn’t look like absolute trainwreck material? Like the true romance in it winds up being that they find a love for themselves? A touch of self worth? I don’t know.

I know I am not the only one that struggles with staying continuously motivated. That’s not to mean that I don’t want to achieve my goals, it just feels like sometimes they are so massive, there is so much to do and to achieve on the path to getting there.

For example this book series, I know I have actually objectively achieved a fair wack of it. If I were to give myself credit for the things I have done so far like:

• Planned books 1-3 enough that they can be written with less continuity errors.
• Outlined books 4-9 with enough wiggle room for inspiration and character developments.
• Written a first draft for book 1.
• Created Character profiles.
• Created location set ups (mental visuals).
• Designed some of the inner art for the characters.
• Edited book 1 multiple times
• Created synopsis for the series and for book 1.
• Began applying to agents.
• Decided to re edit the book while applying to agents because I am an idiot and glutton for punishment.

I look at the above and think yeah that’s not bad, until I look at the next steps that I want to do:

• Write books 2-9
• Edit books 2-9
• Get the bloody thing published.
• Feel damn proud that its done!

Ok that looks shorter because I grouped 2-9 together but if it was singular it’s really not a shorter list at all.

I get why people say that achieving your dreams can be hard. I get that I could self publish it instead of trying to trad. publish it, I do. I just I really want to try for this one. I have the other’s I self published, but none of them hold my heart as much as this particular story.

Somewhere between trying to achieve my dreams and getting that to do list done my brain leaves the building, the dopamine drops or I get busy in the real world and the first thing I sacrifice is my time. But I get that in doing so I am being unfair to myself. I need to get a schedule going, some time where it is protected writing time, and rather than coming here to whinge about it actually do the writing. Maybe I might start using this as an accountability log, at the end of the session come on here and write about it, maybe in time I might look back on this and see how far I have progressed and stop beating myself up and cut myself some slack.

Ok I’ll strike a deal with myself, I will come here at the end of each writing session/editing session/planning session and hold myself accountable even if its a hundred words or more just saying hey today I did xyz got this much done or this many words. Just something. But not just that, I will keep reading the books outside my comfort zone, keep reading my TBR pile that is taunting me with how much to do and I will keep giving my unasked for opinions on them because that is also holding me accountable and getting me to keep persevering with slowly simmering down my TBR.

Two missions. Read books. Write books.

(And realise it is too late to stay sane… because that ship has sailed.)