Darling Daughters

Chapter Twenty


Summer found her negotiation skills tested trying to organise a day when she could go to Darling College that Darling Honor would agree to.  She had to avoid days with mock exams and major class projects, and rather reluctantly Summer had to accept headmaster Maiden’s orders that Cassandra would go with her to look at the college.

Summer had overheard Cassandra bragging about her excursion to Maggy who pouted, this was one excursion she wouldn’t be able to get away with joining. Valarie however seemed more curious if it meant Cassandra would be going to a college party. Summer struggled to suppress her laughter. But even that hadn’t escaped Cassandra’s notice.

Cassandra approached Summer in the girl’s bathroom, it was less an approach and more an ambush. Summer began to feel confined and cornered, something that she had always hated. “Cassandra move.”

“No, I want to talk to you about something.”

“Can I at least wash my hands while you talk.” Cassandra looked her up and down and stepped out of the way.

“I will be valedictorian.”

“Good, I don’t care”

“Sure you don’t”

Summer rolled her eyes and turned to face Cassandra. The threat in the air was clear, Summer really didn’t care, she felt an old helpless anger bubbling from her throat. “Listen to me Cassandra, because this is the last time I will say this to you, I don’t care! I honestly don’t, I have no interest in being valedictorian, I want to get this year done, get it out the way. I don’t care about valedictorian, I don’t care about you and I certainly don’t care about this damn school.”

“Sure you-”

“I haven’t finished talking. Leave me alone. Seriously, I have had enough. You think you are scary, I’ve known worse than you, so go take your conspiracy theories and put them where the sun doesn’t shine.”

Cassandra stood open mouthed when Summer finished turned and walked away. For once Summer had stood up for herself in a way she had never done before. She had stood up for herself, something that felt very strange and left her shaking on the inside.


Summer woke early with a nervous stomach. When she pulled herself from her bed and got dressed she came stumbling into the kitchen pulling on her shoes. A blurry eyed Elizabeth trudged into the room, “coffee, coffee, coffee” she mumbled. Elizabeth groaned, she sat on the chair drinking her coffee while Summer darted about preparing for her day trip. Today was the trip to Darling College, after about half an hour they were on the road to Darling College.

Elizabeth was in a hurried mood, she had a one track mind focused entirely on her to do list as long as her arm. Dropping Summer off was just the start.

Elizabeth dropped Summer off nearby, she had felt like a walk. Elizabeth drove off leaving her walking up the path to Darling College.

Summer enjoyed the walk, peace before she had to face Cassandra again, something that she had avoided. The birds sung and it all seemed so picturesque. It was peace in chaos. Summer’s blood ran cold for a moment hearing Cassandra call her name.

“I thought you would have changed your mind when you found out that I will come here.” Summer didn’t bother to suppress her smirk as she waited for Cassandra to catch up.

“You should be so lucky, I belong here, despite your obvious connection.”

“Not bitter are we Cassandra? You do know, it’s really not attractive.”

“You sound like my mother.” Summer’s face fell, the tension subsided for a moment. Their walk continued in silence. While there was unease between them, they both had a nervous energy. The further along the path they walked the silence became a little unbearable.

“I’m sorry.”

“I know, and for what it’s worth, so am I.”

“Thank you, I guess we should probably try to get along, today is going to be a long day and we are going to need to get along. Us fighting, here it’s not something I want getting back to my grandad. Truce?” Summer offered her hand. Tentatively, Cassandra shook it.



The Diary of Elliot Parker

.: Entry Ninety-Five :.

My name is Elliot Parker and yes Clover was still thinking about that status and what people were saying about her because of it.

Safe to say I kind of had enough of it. She said she wasn’t happy and I told her that she has a choice in what she thinks. She didn’t like that much because her response was “I don’t think you get it, it’s not NICE for me!” Well, that was the last straw of my patience of this. I snapped and no I am not proud but even though I would have loved to cut her a new one for it I tried to be firm but fair while I stood up for myself. “I know you’re not happy, do you think it makes me happy when you post statuses like that about me?” After the many times she had done exactly what that woman is doing to her to me she now had the nerve to act clueless. I wasn’t going to shy away from the point I wanted to make this time, like I had before. “I know you have done it, people have sent me screen shots and proof and I have called you out on it before especially with that whole thing about that abusive twat that you chose.” Her response did her no favours, “that’s different, were you called a dirty little slapper, nope!” (no Clover, but you’ve called me a slut in a roundabout way before because I don’t have to be in love [or obsessed] with someone to sleep with them… but that is beside the point.)

I responded quite shortly given how annoyed I was; I didn’t want to deviate from the point or give any idea that I condone her behaviour. “No I was called a shit friend etc,” she didn’t like me still refusing to budge on my stance. Her response “I’d rather be that, its 100 times better sorry. Better that than a dirty little slapper or a girl who wants to get in every boys pants it’s all lies and fabrications.” Of course I took that to mean she thinks every time she does those statuses she is saying the gods-honest-truth. So I messaged her a thumbs up emoji with “ok so I’m a shit friend” good to know these things isn’t it. Like seriously, does she not even realise what she is saying, that it’s ok for her to post those statuses and have those effects on people as long as they don’t do it to her. She can make everyone else feel as shit is right now, but she doesn’t want any of her own medicine!

She didn’t like my sarcastic but clearly very loaded response. “What are you even talking about? I love how I am having a real shit time not happy at all and yet you want to turn it round on to you something from the past? Erm ok, clearly I’ve missed something here. You want to know if I think you’re a shit friend? No I don’t think you’re a shit friend at all.” Oh but it’s ok to post that publicly across all social media and say all other kinds of things calling me all kinds of things she backs down from when I confront her about because she knows its utter b.s. hmm… double standards much?

So I took my time to make sure I was toning down what I said to be sensitive to her and fair and still stand my ground. “No I want you to accept that she is doing what you’ve done to me and you don’t seem to have any empathy about the consequences of how you make people feel. The fact that you feel this shit about what people are saying about you and that woman isn’t even your best friend.” Which was the point I wanted to make, she feels that shit about someone she isn’t even close to, she thinks its ok to act like that because she feels victorious as a victim and isn’t held accountable for how she acts.

“I’m sorry but this isn’t about you, no she isn’t my best friend.” Well, I haven’t exactly sent her a message or spoken to her since, I have had enough by that point and I walk away. I’ve put her on mute for a while, at the moment its set for a week. She probably sees it as a victory like she is right and I should be the one ashamed of my behaviour. I’m not at all, I am proud that I remained honest and true to myself and was as fair and kind to her as I could be while being firm. Honestly I screenshotted the conversation and sent it to her baby daddy to keep him in the loop so he knew exactly what was said, and what she had implied, he has his little one to think about. I sent him a bit of a long old message.

“I am sorry but I am taking a break from Clover drama. I am sorry to leave you to it with her but I tried to rein myself in and be as fair as I could to her while being as honest as I could without setting her off. I am sorry but I need a break from the stream of negativity, constant boy drama about Sam, Sam, Jamie etc, I can’t keep up and I can’t be a good friend right now if everything I say is constantly being ignored or belittled or it doesn’t fit in with what she wants to hear. I tried being patient but she has pushed too far today and I just want to be happy and enjoy my new relationship without being made to feel bad about it. I am trying to change my life to what I want it to be in terms of writing and a steady income and a possible future with someone who makes me happy, and I think perhaps I need the distance from her so that I can do that without risking things. I am sure that she will be fine and that you will be too, just keep an eye one the little one if Clover has gone on another one of her spirals, she is an intuitive kid, and I know you will have her back.”

His response “yeah, that is probably for the best, just focus on you x”

Darling Daughters

Chapter Nineteen


After a couple of days of ducking and diving Elizabeth finally managed to confront Summer over her avoiding her phone, burying herself in books and moving like the flash, moving like the speed of light in town.

Elizabeth didn’t react how Summer expected, Elizabeth was quiet, but she agreed with Simon, “just tell Zach how you feel, nicely.” Summer nodded taking her phone and walking out the door.

An hour or two later Elizabeth heard the door slam and a Summer sized blur speed into her bedroom and the music begin. “Sum, what happened?” the music went silent, “so I guess you cut the kid loose then?” Summer appeared at the door and glared coldly at Elizabeth. Elizabeth sat next to Summer who had crashed onto her bed.

“Ellie it was awful; it was like breaking up with a tiny puppy. Is it always like that? Is it always so hard?” Elizabeth looked sympathetically at Summer, before she finally replied. “Summer it’s hard for a reason, you know it is the right choice. It is never easy to walk away from someone you care for, but if it didn’t feel right in the relationship it just wasn’t right for you. That’s ok. Its ok if it doesn’t work out, it’s not failing.”

Summer shrugged when Elizabeth suggested takeaway. It seemed that takeaway was the tip of the iceberg of a few days involving takeaway, ice cream and bad comedy movies.


Before long it was Christmas, the girls with no plans decided to take delight in knowing they didn’t have to make a giant formal roast. Their Christmas spirit sat buried in the cupboard with the Christmas decorations. Instead they planned to hang out together and eat copious amounts of junk food. Continue reading

The Diary of Elliot Parker

.: Entry Ninety-Four :.

My name is Elliot Parker and I am doing my best. I am trying so hard to be an understanding person, to have grown and moved forward, but sometimes my little halo slips a little…

You know that song Kill Em with Kindness? Well I think I snapped. Not in a bad way strictly, more in the sense of if I don’t say something I will kill Clover kind of way. We’re kind of in a bit of a fight. She is up at her nans at the moment, that doesn’t mean we nerves and buttons don’t get pushed. Basically for days all I have heard about is some woman (the mother of one of her friends) posting a status on social media. She didn’t use Clover’s name… but what she said… well its caused a bit of a stir. Basically she posted a status along the lines of a type of girl… I mean there’s nothing stopping me writing it here is there?

“Certain girls are amusing me, you know what I mean the kind of girls who: has to be everyone’s friend on here, will like every status, will comment b.s. like “I’m here for you hun” etc, a really loyal friend who… searches on your friends lists and adds all your boy mates, starts sending messages to your fella and claim it was them, the second you split from your fella she’s straight round to him, oh and the first boy that reacts to her she begins a full out relationship (in her head) if they speak more than once she will be in love, she stalks them, when they realise they back off and she is heartbroken and everyone has to hear over and over and over how she has been used… if you hand it to them on a plate they will probably take it…. the girl that the only quality a guy needs for you to fancy them is a pulse”

What a harsh thing to say, but, the thing about stalking a guy or hearing over and over about her obsession with them, it’s not 100% untrue. That was about four or five days ago… give or take, and that was the only thing she was willing to talk about. No matter how many times you tried to bring up a positive conversation or topic, it was her new obsession. I said to her “I think, if they haven’t got the balls to say it to your face rather than play a victim all over social media than that is a prime example.” When I wrote that I was honestly thinking “you’ve done this to me before and now someone is doing it to you. Will you even see the connection?” Apparently not. Because when someone does those statuses it is anything but a reflection of you, it is their own guilt and insecurity reflected back to them… it is not you, it is their vibration.

She had the balls to say “it’s like they are trying to provoke a response so they can be the victims and I am the attacker, this is basically bullying.” I just wanted to stick a mirror in front of her. Sure I write here in my diary but that is exactly what this is, a diary. So, anyway, I responded to that comment as calmly and controlled as I could. “To be honest, whenever it has happened to me I take a break from the relationship with whomever is involved and I refocus my life onto what I want. It is easier and feels better to focus on happiness without a reminder of negativity. It gives concentration and drive to make dreams and decisions about what you want to come into your life in an easy way.” Which is something I do try to do. To be completely honest, that is what I have started doing again. I took out the notebook, wrote down a short list of things that interests me, and said to myself, “ok, this stuff makes you happy, relaxed or smile… let’s do more of that whenever we can. Let’s focus on being happy and let’s look at dreams we want to come true and start taking small bites out the big task to making them come true, one little success at a time!”

The next day same topic of the broken record she wouldn’t change. I tried to be sympathetic… she has it in her head it is because her cousin is trying to date her friend’s ex they are aiming so much of that status at her, she wanted to tell the cousin to either hurry up and lock him down or leave him alone because it is causing her trouble. I said it was a big ask because it was. She seriously asked her cousin to either hurry up and get with someone even if you’re not sure and need to take your time or end the relationship prematurely without finding out if it had a future, that is kind of a cruel thing to ask.

A little while later Clover implied she was looking at how to overdose on her medication, what an overreaction, how insensitive can you get? Your sort of brother in law died at his own hand earlier in the year and you think that form of trying for attention is appropriate? It was cold. I had enough, I was getting to that point in a conversation when you want to rip someone’s head off because they can’t see exactly what they are doing because they are trying to get attention constantly about the same thing. She has too much time on her hands. I am not just saying that just because I am feeling a time shortageness.

A few hours later she pipes up again and pretends to ask how things are before she uses it as a platform to say she is “thinking”. Three guesses to what she was thinking about…

Darling Daughters

Chapter Eighteen


When December finally began the town started to prepare for the annual winter festival. However, Summer and Elizabeth were only just treading water from the piles of work that they always seemed to be buried in. When term time ended and the celebratory spirit descended on the town Summer finally seemed to have found a slightly lighter mood. The first Christmas away from home.

On the first day of the holidays the town had its own sparkling aura of Christmas that had blanketed the place in frost. Summer had done the homework she had been set. All family obligations had been dissolved. The air was cool and crisp and the town just seemed magical.

Elizabeth and Summer headed to work as a team of volunteers began to decorate the gazebo, the centre of the net of fairy lights spreading through the town. Stands were being erected on the crisp grass snapping below their feet.

Zach stopped by the Diner on the way to the market for his shift. He pulled Summer aside to ask if she was still ok to go to the festival with him. She nodded. After he left the Saturday morning rush started to come to a quiet lull. Now that she wasn’t rushed off of her feet she began to over think, feeling awkward. She could now be considered a trust fund kid; even if she and Elizabeth had those opportunities they didn’t want to give up their work. As far as they had decided, it was for emergencies only.

Reality had set in for Elizabeth and Summer, in terms of their education, their future had been laid out for them in no uncertain terms. Along with startling clarity that Matthew and Stuart had deemed Zach and Simon unsuitable. Summer had remained silent through that particular lecture, she found herself in quiet surprise when she realised that they were right, Zach wasn’t “the one”. When she accepted that everything has a shelf life, an expiry date, it didn’t have to be forever. It was both a liberating and a sad realisation. Continue reading

The Diary of Elliot Parker

.: Entry Ninety-Three :.

My name is Elliot Parker. I am frustrated with Clover; some things never change huh? I know it can be stupid, the energy that gets spent being frustrated or annoyed by her behaviour. I suppose that just means that I know what I don’t want and she is one source of consistent clarity. Although that doesn’t exactly sound flattering either.

So why am I frustrated this time? Well, you see, I don’t mean to sound like a jerk or insecure about this, but it is just an observation that has been highlighted a lot recently. She has been very reluctant to show any support or interest in the way things are going with Dyl. It seems the happier I am with him, the more time I spend with him, the less she wants to be part of a day to day conversation. So we talk a lot less. On the rare occasion I do pipe up and say that I am happy or when I am with her and get a message from Dyl you can see her turning sour. She will either ignore it or bring up Adrian as in a “what about Adrian?” kind of question like what about him?

Sometimes it seems as though she sees me moving on and sees it as a threat to her feelings and her obsession with her ex and trying to get him back. Like it threatens her plans, her dreams of them getting back together. I suppose she is wanting me to do the same as her and wait for Adrian to finally decide that he wants me. I don’t want to live that way, and unlike her opinion it doesn’t lessen how I felt about him or negate it. I am simply choosing me; I am choosing being happy. It is me choosing to stop hurting myself waiting for something to happen that wasn’t going to happen, if it was, it would have happened a long time ago, when I took those risks. If it was going to happen it would have. So yes I am not torturing myself over it. Now I am happy in so many ways, and she is trying to chain me back up to pain and I am not playing the game. She is pushing for the past to try to make it relevant.

It’s sad to realise that she probably won’t ever support me with anyone but Adrian. It shows her that there is a life after heartbreak, it’s less to do with Dyl, less to do with me, but everything to do with her. There is no point taking her lack of support up as an issue with her, I would be better off just enjoying being happy and showing her that happiness is something I really care about and I am responsible for it. I am showing her it is ok to move on. When it comes to Clover, I could tell her until I am blue in the face and it would make no difference, but if I show her, eventually she realises its ok and she tries to do the same.

Maybe in return, I have shown pretty much no interest in whatever boys she is now talking to and flirting with, I can’t keep up anymore. I don’t want to keep pretending like I know or understand who she is talking about all the time, I can’t keep track of who she is flirting with. It’s hard and impossible to win. She is doing what makes her happy, distracting herself. I just want to see her move on and be happy.

I know my frustration with her is purely selfish. I am happy I want to share and shout to the world just how happy I am. It has almost become the natural default. I like that, it feels good to be inspired to just feel good and enjoy the happiness, although it makes my productivity pretty low. I wish that wasn’t the case. But at the moment, I have barely done anything I was meant to do for weeks. My ever long to do list has barely been touched. I think it might take some consistent thought, some kind of consistent ease, to push me towards managing to get what I want done. I think, probably, as of next week I need to be more careful with my choices and what I want to do. I can see the future weeks unfolding in a fun and easy way as I find a balance. If that means finding a better time and schedule to get things done, then it looks like I will do it. I need to make the most of my time and push the easiness of what I want to do and achieve. I can do it… I have to believe I can do it.

I know that there is potential for some amazing things to happen.

Like right now, a little secret, I can feel myself falling for Dyl. It’s like the thing that I have been missing has been filled in. It’s a natural fit. He makes me burst with excitement. I blush uncontrollably. I can’t help but smile when it comes to Dyl. He is in some ways the person I want to be and become, the naturally happy person I am learning to be. A perfect manifestation, a confirmation of every joy that I am becoming. Someone who accepts and embraces my embarrassing self. Someone who brings out my more affectionate side, someone who makes me soft and gentle and so sentimental it is at times like someone else has taken over me. Perhaps that someone else is just that person I am when I am happy, he brings out the happiness in me with nothing more than a smile. So I suppose I am also falling in love with the person I am becoming, the person that he brings out in me, the hopeful and happy me. He brings out the best in me.

The 2018 Project

February has been and gone and have I managed to achieve any of these goals? The answer to that is a resounding no. I am working on goals 2 and 4 but very slow progress. I know it takes little steps to make the marathon, but bloody hell is this one up hill. I think this year is going to be one of those harder to achieve the goals years. Last year felt so easy, but I suspect this year will be a very different story. But that’s ok, if I can do seven of them I get to say I completed my New Years Resolution.


24/7 Goals:

  1. Do Nanowrimo
  2. Write The Diary of Elliot Parker (4)
  3. Draft up book 2 of The Big Project
  4. Re-edit book 1 of The Big Project
  5. Edit book 2 of The Big Project
  6. Learn to drive
  7. See a West End show
  8. Complete at least one of the tattoos
  9. Improve on last year’s site views
  10. Keep learning guitar
  11. Create and keep a manageable writing schedule
  12. Look for/find an agent for The Big Project
  13. Finish the cable knit jumper
  14. Start and finish a cross stitch project
  15. Win the lotto jackpot
  16. Keep growing hair out
  17. Keep doing daily positive aspects
  18. Complete at least one minor savings goal
  19. Have Christmas wrapped up before October 31st
  20. Read around 12 books at least over the year for fun…
  21. Be more time efficient, come up with a better schedule.
  22. Fit into the blue dress again and go somewhere to celebrate it
  23. Begin writing the next big project for the site
  24. Enjoy 2018 as much as possible, be happy at every chance!!!!

Darling Daughters

Chapter Seventeen


When the sun rose on the day of the debutante ball Elizabeth and Summer were feeling hopeful. Summer and Elizabeth had been stealing moments to do paperwork to access the accounts attached the buildings.

It was a rush, a chaotic rush for both girls that day, when they picked Zach and Simon up they were trying to calm their nerves enough. Even when they arrived at the building for the ball they felt the intensity of their anxiety. When they split from one another to different areas of the building Summer and Elizabeth had to wait in the debutante girls waiting area. Summer and Elizabeth helped one another with their dresses and their hair. They quietly observed the other girls amidst the cloud of hairspray and debates over lipsticks, lip glosses and nail varnishes.

In a darker corner a few of the girls were grimacing as they drank shots in an attempt to calm their nerves. Something Elizabeth wouldn’t have minded doing herself. Elizabeth pointed out a girl to Summer, the girl was having a meltdown due to her lipstick being a bit too pink.

It took a while for the girls to be ushered into the hallway with their appropriate gather or in Elizabeth and Summer’s case, grandfather. One by one they were called down the staircase. Elizabeth lead the way as she emerged on the staircase, Summer peered after her. Elizabeth seemed to glide down the staircase, Summer couldn’t help but register the smile on Simon’s face as he waited to receive her. He seemed to beam, it couldn’t have been more of a perfect smile for him, even if he had that furrow in his brow, perhaps he was more nervous than he let on.

Soon it was Summer’s turn, her mind raced but she kept her face in that structured smile. She avoided locking eyes with anyone. Her heart raced, what would she do with the way she felt now Zach was in her eye line. He was smiling and beaming at her, and the smile she wore felt false. She was nervous, her hand was shaking when he took it. Continue reading

The Diary of Elliot Parker

.: Entry Ninety-Two :.

My name is Elliot Parker and recently I have been spending more time with Dyl. That hasn’t come without issues though. None of those issues come from Dyl.

I know I have been a bit more distant with Adrian. But with that distance comes issues of its own. He sent me a message the other day about going on that weekend away for a pampering and I realised I didn’t feel comfortable going if the expectation of me was for sex. I know I shouldn’t look at him, about the trip like that. But it brings about its own issues. So anyway I called him when he asked to try to sort out the date and such and he got a bit distracted that I was on my way out for dinner after work and wouldn’t be able to call him when I got back because of the time difference. I got a text a few minutes later after hanging up, that it sounded like I was going on a date. So it wasn’t really a date in the strictest terms, I was going to see Dyl yes, but it was an on the fly “hey wanna come over for dinner tonight, I’m ordering Chinese” and we ended up watching a movie and we fell asleep.

I do care about Adrian, I do want him to be happy, I don’t want to hurt him. I asked him flat out where I stood with him before and he just responded with “just do what makes you happy”. Way for stuff I say to him to bite me on the ass, he was being evasive. That’s fine, but if that is the attitude he wants to take when I am asking him where I stand then I suppose I have my answer rather than take a chance. I am all about taking chances and risks and going for what I want. So I suppose my frustration has always been palpable when I know what I want I just go for it and enjoy it.

Ok back to it, so Adrian had sent the message about being on a date and I said it was dinner out, but I have been asked on a date and that I wanted to talk to him properly. He sort-of got a little defensive, like seriously, the friends with benefits situation is what he bloody well wanted. Except now, I don’t want the benefits if you catch my drift. It put me in a mood because that conversation felt like a hornet’s nest had been kicked. I mean I haven’t exactly talked to or messaged him since, it’s been like three days, which given his recent consistent increased messages up until that day was a bit weird. So I did just send a message asking how he is doing and how his coursework is going. His response? That he will call tonight (late afternoon/early evening for me). I’m not sure I will actually get that call though. I’m not sure what I will say.

I kind of feel like giving up, because no matter what I know that it won’t matter in the long run because whatever is meant to be will come about and there is nothing I need to do.

My name is Elliot Parker and spending that time with Dyl feels good. It feels relaxed like I can be my goofy self and it’s ok. I don’t have to try to be perfect or try to fit into someone’s image of me. I like spending time with Dyl. We try to fit time with each other in, although, that being said, we normally fit it around food which is ok.

So yesterday I agreed to a date after work sometime in the next few days. I’m kind of nervous, sounds stupid because I already know we get on pretty good, and he does seem to be a lovely gentleman to me. But a date-date. Like I need to wear something sort of nice, it is after work I know, but I still gotta put on something cute after work, I need to find an outfit that will work.

Truth be told, I have been trying to work out how I feel more often now, trying to focus on positives and work on knowing with clarity how I feel because I love how clarity feels. So yes, I have started writing letters, there is six at the moment, I know I’ve dated them, I keep them in a shoe box, in that shoe box is me trying to work out how I feel or a message about something that has happened in relation to Dyl and it is my new way of figuring myself out. I am trying to navigate these new feelings, rather than talk them through with girlfriends, there is only one I talk to for advice reliantly. I suppose I just hope those letters aren’t found and read, especially not by Dyl, not right now at least, could you imagine the awkwardness that that would bring?

Mind you at this rate, if things keep going well, I might need another writing set. I just thought it would be a good thing to do, for myself. I suppose I want to increase the positive happy stuff that makes me happy. Dyl keeps joking about finding and reading my diary, little does he know, he probably will never read this, the awkward diary of trying to navigate my emotions. The awkwardness of me trying to figure out this deliberate creation stuff.

I can’t wait to see what I end up manifesting next, I am enjoying the working things out part of deciding what I want to do, I am enjoying choosing what I want. I know where I want to be, what I want my impossible dreams to be. I am ready for impossible dreams to come true. I like how it feels, I like how I feel as a deliberate creator, I just wonder how I got here sometimes.

Author Update (February 2018)

2018 has been great so far… Already had a few ups and downs but that is bound to happen I am sure.

Well, safe to say its been a pretty tame-ish February, I haven’t done nearly as much writing as I did in January but I am sure that will change. Kind of fell off the writing wagon again and got distracted by all things that can be classed as procrastination.


The latest binge watching on Netflix? I am still watching Grimm which is a bit addictive but not one that I can watch late at night. Late night viewing is reserved for watching the Gilmore Girls… But with new Jane the Virgin I have been mixing it up a bit. Yup you can see how I have been hit by the procrastination fairy…

So Guitar has been so very little progress but I am learning Perfect by Ed Sheeran  which is hard, its one that I chose because it has a little sentimental value to it… I am absolutely rubbish at this one, but it is one I want to (no pun intended) get perfect.

Social life? Yep I indulged in a real one this month, probably explains the no writing thing. I got to go ice -skating. Which as fun as it is, absolutely murders your feet. Its still one of those fun things to dabble in once in a while. Makes life a little exciting.

I have been toying with some more writing ideas though… Mainly in the shower when they occur and I seem to almost never do anything about them, mainly because they are always incredibly complicated and require many rewrites. Maybe one will stick.

Nothing changes here in terms of throwing plugs in for my amazon books on my author page

May luck and adventure be on your side!